9/10/2021

Overcoming Bitchphobia in Business

~2 min read
Two people

The number one reason keeping women small in business is the fear of being a bitch.

We’re afraid to disagree to take a stance, for fear of offending. I see this most vividly in my work with rural women business owners. In a small town, where tongues love to wag, everyone relishes a good fight, and the thought of upsetting the loudmouths in our community is enough to scare us into meekness!

This fear is justified; research shows that women who publicly disagree with others, no matter how correct or justified, are perceived more negatively by both men and women.

The social stereotype that women must be collaborative, agreeable and gracious gets in our way of getting things done in business! This is what it looks like:

  • We don’t put up our prices when the numbers absolutely warrant it
  • We give in too easily to requests for discounts and refunds
  • We don’t charge when people cancel at the last minute
  • We agree to yet another donation to a cause we don’t care about
  • We agree to sit on a committee out of obligation
  • We don’t fire someone when they deserve it.

The first step in avoiding this pitfall is to reprogram our mindset. Here’s how:

#1 – Remember WHY you’re doing this: Most women I work with tell me they do what they do because they want to help others. So how are you going to continue doing that if you’re not earning a proper living in your business? You’re not being a bitch when it’s a business decision.

#2 – Remember WHO you’re doing this for: If #1 doesn’t work for you, then think of the ones you were doing this for, namely your family. Your kids need new stuff for back-to-school, right? There is nothing wrong with earning a decent wage so you can support your family. Remember your Mama Bear energy!

#3 – Surround yourself with other bitches: We all waffle on advocating for ourselves at some point. Doing this effectively means surrounding yourself with others who will encourage you to stand firm.

Bitchphobia prevents too many of us women entrepreneurs from doing great things in business. It’s time to unlearn and step into our bitch power.

What Do You Think?

Please share your experiences and thoughts below. Let’s learn from one another and celebrate each other’s successes.

Thanks for reading!

The number one reason keeping women small in business is the fear of being a bitch.

We’re afraid to disagree to take a stance, for fear of offending. I see this most vividly in my work with rural women business owners. In a small town, where tongues love to wag, everyone relishes a good fight, and the thought of upsetting the loudmouths in our community is enough to scare us into meekness!

This fear is justified; research shows that women who publicly disagree with others, no matter how correct or justified, are perceived more negatively by both men and women.

The social stereotype that women must be collaborative, agreeable and gracious gets in our way of getting things done in business! This is what it looks like:

  • We don’t put up our prices when the numbers absolutely warrant it
  • We give in too easily to requests for discounts and refunds
  • We don’t charge when people cancel at the last minute
  • We agree to yet another donation to a cause we don’t care about
  • We agree to sit on a committee out of obligation
  • We don’t fire someone when they deserve it.

The first step in avoiding this pitfall is to reprogram our mindset. Here’s how:

#1 – Remember WHY you’re doing this: Most women I work with tell me they do what they do because they want to help others. So how are you going to continue doing that if you’re not earning a proper living in your business? You’re not being a bitch when it’s a business decision.

#2 – Remember WHO you’re doing this for: If #1 doesn’t work for you, then think of the ones you were doing this for, namely your family. Your kids need new stuff for back-to-school, right? There is nothing wrong with earning a decent wage so you can support your family. Remember your Mama Bear energy!

#3 – Surround yourself with other bitches: We all waffle on advocating for ourselves at some point. Doing this effectively means surrounding yourself with others who will encourage you to stand firm.

Bitchphobia prevents too many of us women entrepreneurs from doing great things in business. It’s time to unlearn and step into our bitch power.

What Do You Think?

Please share your experiences and thoughts below. Let’s learn from one another and celebrate each other’s successes.

Thanks for reading!

Community Manager | Gestionnaire de la communauté
Community Manager | Gestionnaire de la communauté
Community Manager | Gestionnaire de la communauté
Join the conversation
Thank you! Your comment has been received! We will review it before publishing it.
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting your comment.
0
Comments
what-do-women-need-from-a-business-conference-right-now
Ashley Lapierre
1790185040260
Hi Doreen and Business Sisters, What an amazing post! You have me, emotionally. It's amazing how much we put on our plate and how much we actually manage to balance. When I discuss with people what I do in the run of a week, they ask me how I do it. I always reply I take things minute by minute. I don't know how I do it, I just know it needs to get done and what's considered priority in that moment. I've learnt that this doesn't always serve us well. I've become overstimulated, exhausted and realizing that the little things that seemed so normal and easy to do, became forgotten and caused unneeded stress. One thing I got from this year is letting go. Letting go of what I cannot change, letting go of what no longer serves me and releasing it with grace. I know and I feel it to not be enough, which got me curious and resonating with your post. How even though I live so close, the thought of a quiet room to collect my thoughts from the last 7 years of not having a break, makes me teer up. I say this, to say thank you in advance for a relaxation room. Giving permission to reset. I am also very excited for the ask us anything discussions as no business is the same and answers are different depending on circumstances. I am really looking forward to your new format of the conference and look forward to meeting you all there!!
from-doreens-desk---confession-life-has-been-chaos-lately
Isabelle
1784128172423
Merci de soulever ce point important qui demeure ignoré, parfois consciemment par certains et inconsciemment par d'autres. Ces ''ping'' que je reçois lorsque je travaille (Chats, courriels,…) me grugent à moi aussi mon énergie. Au travail, je n'ai pas le choix que de les laisser actifs, sinon je reçois un appel me demandant si j'ai pris connaissance du courriel ou du message chat. Quand c'est la fête de quelqu'un, on peut avoir des dizaines de messages défiler et donc ''pinguer'' dans les premières heures de ma journée de travail. Le moment où ma concentration et mon énergie sont à leur meilleur. De plus, ces messages veulent aussi dire que je passe mon temps sur des tâches disparates et soudaines et peu de temps sur les choses qui sont importantes, qui font une réelle différence. Merci du partage. Je me sens moins unique dans mon ressenti.
from-theory-to-reality-my-immersion-with-business-sisters
Jacqueline
1778114095697
Thanks for the share Manel. Glad you enjoyed and learned from this experience. A wonderful first hand experience to share with your friends too. All the best in your future adventures.
mentorship-changes-everything-celebrating-our-partnership-with-the-scotiabank-women-initiative
Hélène Faubert
1764380823000
Having this mentorship available with Scotia Bank is an unbelievable opportunity and tool to help anyone in business. Truly blessed that Business Sisters has this connection and information to help business sisters.
radical-generosity-resetting-and-the-power-of-asking
Hélène Faubert
1764385083000
We have to learn that sharing what we learned in our businesses and the experience we acquired are things we can share without feeling that our business will be robbed by competition in the business world, competition is often good in the business world as it keeps us honest, accountable, and determined to do the best we can with the products or services we provide. Confidence goes a long way in knowing we give our best, share our failures and successes and always have an ear open to learn and maintain a voice to speak and be heard.
census-2025-results-are-in-learn-about-the-women-entrepreneurs-of-business-sisters
Donna MacDonald
1748636476525
That’s fantastic to hear! Data like this truly highlights the dedication, resilience, and diversity within the Business Sisters Entrepreneurs community. It’s inspiring to see how their hard work and innovation contribute to the broader business landscape.
hr-challenges-how-not-to-feel-like-a-bitch
Denise Sukkau
1723132740137
We are entering a time when women need to take our place, fill up our space and be who we are without apology. I have difficulty with this and thus I try to keep expanding, keep learning, keep letting go of those past experiences that have kept me small(er). Our culture and past societal 'norms' in a patriarchal time have diminished our voice in addition to other past traumas to women. In supporting each other we can rise together without guilt or shame for being a b*tch or any other shadow expression of our soul, to embrace our power that is within. (Please note I have recently come off of a feminine empowerment retreat called Rise Sister Rise.)
navigating-networking-real-talk-for-business-sisters
Moumie
1712533017881
Bonjour Doreen, J'aime cet article, c'est bien dit... !!😄 Je rajoute, tu es aussi pour ma part, dans ton rôle, de pouvoir encadrer les choses autant que tu peux car, gérer les êtres humains est une tâche énorme pour n'importe quelle occasion. Je viens d'apprendre aussi une chose intéressante, la philosophie de Ted Lasso, je ne connaissais pas cette série, je vais la regarder. Merci de partager cela. Donc, en un mot, tout ca est intéressant moi, je te trouve en tout cas authentique :)!! Bravo pour ton leadership👍
meet-the-business-sisters-results-of-the-first-ever-census-of-our-community
Lexine
1710194161296
Huh - ma première réaction - 41% ont plus de 6 employés. Il serait intéressant de voir combien sont des sous-contractants VS part-time VS full-time, et les liens aux revenus bruts?
Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.
Be the first to comment!

Continue Reading